Is Your Man A Sociopath? Find Out At Museums Around The World

Let’s face it. Who’s got time to date someone for months only to find out he's a narcissistic sociopath with an ego the size of Alaska and a heart as cold?

Inherent in artefacts at museums all over the world are the overarching themes of love, betrayal, war, pain, passion, and greed. Use them to litmus test your man. 

This article will outline 5 object archetypes to view on a day out at the museum. Listen carefully to how he talks about each to find out if he's the real deal or if you should beeline for the ladies' room and escape through the tiny window. You can thank me later.

5 objects to view and start conversations around to scope out if he's a(n):

 

  • Avaricious mercenary down with unethical behavior
  • Unstable sociopath who will do or say anything to get his way
  • Obsessive-compulsive with a crippling spending habit
  • Substance abuser
  • Stand-up guy with potential (yay!)

To illustrate my points, I will use objects from The Met. But you can find similar objects at many museums all over the world. 

1. Nutmeg Grater

 A paragraph about the spice trade and the V.O.C. Pillage and plunder.

 

Tip: Find an item in your museum relating to the spice trade.

2. Chintz

 

 A paragraph about Robert Clive and the EIC. Cotton textile important export to Britain. "Loot" the word . source: Guardian article

 

3. Blue and White Porcelain

 Wealthy Europeans became obsessed with collecting porcelain. Entire rooms with custom made furniture would be dedicated to displaying their porcelain collections. Akin to "shoe closets" or "walk in closets" with designer wares.

  • Heartless money-grubbin', right-leanin', Trump supportin'capitalist

4. Opium Paraphernalia

 

That is why museums are some of the best places on earth to bring dates to quickly assess if the new person in your life belongs in the “Marry Me," “We'll See," or the “Don't Call Me. I'll Call You” pile.

 

whether to put a ring on it or to nip it in the bud and thank your lucky stars.